To the little things in life.

Sitting here in cold, drab Salem, my thoughts can't help but drift back to Thailand.

It's actually warm there. It's nearly the middle of June and it's still in the 60s (Fahrenheit). I was thinking on the plane-ride home, it's going to be nice to have an extra 2 months of summer....

Even with the sun out in Portland, I felt as if I was going to need a jacket with the arrival of the evening. When we all finally arrived in Salem, my hopes improved; it was warm and sunny.

Then Sunday morning came around. It was colder than a Minnesota December (figuratively; not quite sure how that works, but it's what I've got.....). I didn't want to get out of bed, even with my paper thin bed sheet over me. I wanted to maintain what little vestige of warmth that I had. So I jump out of my bed (nearly hitting my head on the bunk above me), grab my towel, and made a run for my underwear cubby in the army-like barracks that we are staying in here at the base in Salem and headed for the shower.

I arrive in the shower and the first burst of what can best be referred to as "maddening" invades my space. After the initial, aggravating shot of Antarctica to my chest, I feel a warmth come over me.

Even as the sun begins to rise, the cold is making its last stand at 8:30 in the morning; and frankly, it's a little angry for having to leave.

Thankfully there's still 2 months of summer left.

-nate-

A Short Dissertation on Returning Home

This is an act so seemingly innocuous as to often be taken with a certain amount of anxiety. Call it experience or smart planning, I have been known to arrive back home from some time overseas and get the old stone-faced, disinterested look. Those who have spent time for extended periods of time and weren't parching the hell out of their skin will attest to this: People simply do not care what 'God does in your life".

A generalization you might say. Whether or not this statement is universally true, I have discovered that people's interest in vicarious missions is somewhere around a marginal 1%.

So with that said, I am reluctant to return home and face all my friends, family and co-workers.

I spent a few hours walking around the YWAM Bangkok base, reflecting on my time over the last two months. What I came out with was a looming feeling of depression. It seemed to arise from thoughts of leaving. Leaving something behind that you have invested in; actually invested in. This is something completely new to me.

Yeah, I went to college, graduated. Haven't seen a payoff from that yet. This DTS has exposed me in the error of my ways and shown me how incredibly self-centered and materially driven the majority of America is. This caused everyone on our team to turn towards the people and give the only thing we knew how to give --- love.

So back to the walk.

I realized as I was walking through the night market, with impressive force, that I was going to have a BIG decision to make. The decision that I've heard countless people who have spent time on a DTS or even in short term missions voice. The slow, calculated choice to stagnate, rot and die (spiritually) or respond to the knowledge to which you have been exposed. One of our speakers during the 5th week of my lecture phase said "Man is responsible to the amount of light that he knows".

If an unsaved person suddenly realizes his need for God and does not do something about it; he is, in a sense, sinning against himself and God. His lack of a relationship with Christ is evidence of this anyways; but this is a completely different subject matter for a different blog.

So much like the unsaved man, my responsibility lies in what I know.

The proof of the pudding will be in the tasting, as they say.